PALINDROMIC

(“How to Make a Pessimist” :Concept Album: Track# 8)

~Verse 1~
I…fight the urge to sleep

I …deny a coming dream

Wherein the dark awaits

The recollections of my pain

For it does not comfort know

that desperation holds

The reflections of a stare

mirrored in a face of despair

Denial wont pretend

That this will ever end

And it begs my life to give

a gun, whiskey and sedatives

Left here, I contemplate

A short cut to my fate

Where I might find myself

….somewhere …south …of…hell…

~~

You’ll rouse the devil in me…

If you should dare to ask

Of my sensibilities

and sins and troubled past

That which interprets me

Is lifeless yet I breathe

so….be sure it’s what you need

Or I may require that you…bleed

(Bridge)

Palindromic

I shall end

As Alone in death as life began

Trust is such bullshit….

You never seem to know when to quit….

Comes round and back again

Just like a wave of sin

To raise your hope and then..you realize

…its too late and this is the end

~CHORUS~

And so Im trying not to show the tears

And I struggle not to succumb to fear

While alcohol is calling me

And a gun promises to set me free…

And Im..holding everything inside

…as if everything will be alright

…..this hurts like a bastard…

But…I… will…. Not…..cry!

(Bridge)

Palindromic

I shall end

As Alone in death as life began

Trust is such bullshit….

I never seem to learn when to quit….

Palindromic…in the end…

Back where I first began

In the darkness all alone

A womb of death to welcome me ..home.

(Chorus)

And Im..holding everything inside

…as if everything will be alright

…..hurts like a bastard…

But…I… will…. Not…..cry!

So…I, push the gun aside..

Throw these pills into the night..

…hurts like a bastard

But, I will not die….

Written 2006

By Heaven’s Spear Kittrell

(Revision for Copyright Jan 2010)

　2007 Long intro (I always do long intros) Mastering needs much work,so do vocals,There is a chord voicing that I cannot seem to master out,because in the pre- mixdown arrangement it cannot be heard,even when I have isolated the instrument and turned everything down to 6 db and below.It cannot be heard.It is in the distortion fade of the electric guitar.I have tried cutting it,fading it,decreasing it.I cannot hear it at all in the mmm arrangement..format,no matter if I play it through different stereo systems,headphones or speakers.It manifests only after I mixdown to mp3..it is frustrating...I will keep trying to fix the problem....It is still overmodulated and I have turned ALL the volume levels down to 6db and some to 3db...vocals are bad because I was emotional when I sung it,(I dont have a good voice but I try)Im working on fixing this one but I thought Id post it here anyway it sucks..